Monthly Archives: November 2017

Narcissists Can’t Forgive: It’s Science!

Narcissists can’t forgive! OK, put this in the category of ‘No kidding!’According to a 2004 study by Julie Exline (et al) published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (Vol 87, 2004), narcissism is a “robust distinct predictor of unforgiveness”.It would seem that the narcissisist’s innate expectation of special treatment and preoccupation of defending […]

Unforgiveness Kills!

Unforgiveness kills. It kills us as people. Recent studies have shown that couples who are harboring resent have higher cortisol levels in their blood. Cortisol is normally a good thing to our body, but if left at high levels for extended periods can lead to illness, fatigue, depression, or perhaps more serious physical breakdowns. One […]

Awkward Holiday Gatherings?

I read a very insightful book by Terry Hargrave, Families and Forgiveness: Healing Wounds in the Intergenerational Family (New York:Brunner/Mazel Publishers, 1994). Very insightful and on point with the philosophy held by this website. It is particularly helpful to help us understand why so often our high romantic expectations of wonderful family Holiday gatherings don’t […]

The War of Desires Within Us

“What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?” (James 4:1-2) “Notice also that James does not place the word “evil” before the word “desire.” Although evil desires for wrong things can be a source of conflict, James is addressing something more fundamental. He says, “Don’t your […]

Thoughts on Suffering by Tolkien and C.S. Lewis

Thoughts on Suffering from Tolkien and Lewis  “Gandalf! I thought you were dead! But then I thought I was dead myself. Is everything sad going to come untrue? What’s happened to the world?” 
“A great Shadow has departed,” said Gandalf, and then he laughed and the sound was like music, or like water in a […]